Barn Roof Wide Silo Left

Motivations and Fears of Starting a Farm

I have always enjoyed being outdoors. This realization was not always immediately evident to me, but after 20 years in the Army it became very clear that what I really wanted to do with my time was spend it with my family on my own land. I have become filled with an idealistic vision of developing a landscape and having its production, support my family with a place to live and an income for the rest of my days. If my kids decide they are not interested in entering the rat-race and want to stay and help to build up our land and business, then so be it.

I foresee some major benefits to starting a family farmstead business. The main ones are as follows:

  1. My prosperity is directly proportional to my drive to succeed and build a better, healthier life for myself and my family; and that drive is high.
  2. I will get back countless hours that were typically spent driving, sitting in traffic, sitting in meetings, stressing about things beyond my control because they directly affect my success, etc.
  3. I will get to work outside, raising animals in the most ethical and healthy way possible.
  4. My family will be provided with the most healthy food nature can produce, free of chemical pesticide, herbicide, fungicide, any-cide.
  5. I will be creating a homestead, and a business that can be passed on to my kids, and their kids if that is the way fate takes us. My children will be welcome and encouraged to pursue their own desires within the context of the farmstead business. For instance, my daughter likes to draw so she will be encouraged, and compensated to produce all marketing-related artwork for the farmstead. My son is more interested in YouTubing so he can explore video editing and become experienced at producing quality content for the farmstead’s online presence.

One of the hardest parts with moving forward with the farmstead plan is fear of failure. Right now I have a good job with decent pay and great health benefits. Once I leave the Army for the farmstead life, I will take an immediate reduction in pay coupled with a large increase in the cost of health insurance. My mind keeps coming back to “If I fail, then I am putting my whole family’s lifestyle at risk.” I know that it is going to be an enormous challenge, but I still need to remind myself that I am motivated and willing to do the work. If I want it bad enough, it will happen and I just need to maintain that mindset to overcome my fear of failure.

At the same time, it is quite liberating to mentally commit to a path and then will yourself to proceed even though the outcome is not guaranteed. I know that if I were to fail as a farmer (which I won’t) that I would find work somewhere doing something to support my family so there is always a backup plan. That being said, I will make the farm work no matter what it takes.

A little further introspection shows me that my fears are based in finance and not in ability, so I just need to overcome the fear of financial failure and rely on myself to make the rest fall into place. I recently watched a speech given by Warren Buffet in 1999 and the part that most stuck with me was that when he spoke with people at the end of their careers (having worked a job that they truly found fulfilling), not one of them said that they would have chosen a more lucrative career path that would have been less enjoyable. To me this means that in the end, money is less important than happiness. I also understand that it takes money to live in the world, but that money is there to be made doing something I enjoy just as much as it is there to be made doing something that I do not enjoy.

Tanya’s Side of the Story

I too have always enjoyed the outdoors. I feel the most at peace with myself and the world when I am outdoors. I crave being outside. Even on a busy day, I will find the time to sit outside and just relax and clear my mind. However, unlike my husband, I do not equate the idea of farming to my outdoor happiness. I equate farming to hard, hard, work. I have never worked on a farm a day in my life, but I did get to see farm life up close with my Uncle Shorty. He was an old school farmer, if he didn’t grow it or raise it, he didn’t eat it. He had no plumbing or electricity and still had a functioning outhouse when I was a teenager. My Mother and my Aunt worked on that farm and I saw the work that Uncle shorty put into it. It was back breaking, sun up to sun down work. It never once appealed to me to be the life I would like to have for myself, even with plumbing or electricity.

So what makes me excited to take this new journey with my family? It is mostly for my husband. He has sacrificed so much of his life and happiness to provide for our family over the years. He has missed so much, over the years so that he could ensure a good life for us. His sacrifices have enabled me to be retired (for the most part) for the past 13 years. I have lived my dream of staying home with my children, not missing a moment of their lives – because he did miss those moments. He willingly and happily with no complaint, drove long distances to work, was gone so often from his family, and worked his butt off so that we were taken care of. He will be able to retire soon and it is his turn to be happy. It is his turn to do what he loves, to enjoy his days, to work for himself, to not have to sit in a car on a highway for hours. If that means I run with the chickens, well I’ll run with the chickens then! I most probably will be running FROM the chickens, however.

I do agree with my husband on the aspect of providing a healthier future for ourselves and our children. Healthier food options for our family and knowing where our food comes from is very important to me. Healthier is happier. I love the idea of the children helping using their talents and doing things that they enjoy. Working as a team, as a family, will bring us closer together. My hope is that we can build something that we all enjoy, can be proud of, and can be passed down to our children if it is their desire to continue.

Does this journey scare me? Of course. I kind of have a serious complex about being poor. I tried that out for most of my life before I met my husband and I can’t say that it agreed with me. By poor I mean that at one point as a child, I lived in a box. Granted it was only for a week and it was a nice plywood box with a mattress in it, built by my father… it was still a box. I have lived in campers, I have stolen sample packs of grits out of newspapers to eat for the week. Poor is not fun, poor sucks. Being poor motivated me to get whatever skills I needed to do better. It took a very long time to do that, but I did do it and I promised myself I would never be poor again. I know that my current life is not considered the rich life to most. To me, I do feel rich though. My children will never know hunger, they don’t go without, they have such a better childhood than I did. Taking a risk, leaving what we know and diving into the unknown, scares me. I fear loosing this lifestyle that we have created for ourselves.

When I have these thoughts however, I have to remind myself that being poor also taught me that when you hit an unexpected low, you will figure things out. At that point it is your only option. I know that my husband would never put or family in jeopardy of what I call being poor. That simply is not an option for him. He is the most determined man that I know and when he sets his mind to something, there is nothing that can stop him. He is also not going all willy nilly into this venture. He has done all of his research and has the work ethic, drive, and passion to make this venture successful. Should something happen, we will find a way to move forward.

I agree that once you get passed the fears, that it is actually exciting. I’ve never wanted to leave this home of ours, but now I find myself excited at the prospect of moving, having more time with my husband, more land for our family to enjoy, and seeing my husband truly happy and stress free.

I will admit that I am not looking forward to the chickens attacking me. I’d like to think my giant dino dog will save me, but lets be honest… he will be more scared than I am!

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