CJ’s side of the story
Sometimes it is difficult to decide on a course of action and still be confident that the decision was made to produce the maximum benefit with the information available at the given time. For instance, our home currently sits on a 1/10th acre lot in a relatively high tax area. I could sell my house and use that money as a down payment on a multi-acre property with the same taxes I currently pay. I browse the real estate sites and look at homes within a given price range that meet my specified criteria (3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, not in a HOA, etc.) and compile the likely candidates so that they are ready when we decide as a family it is time to move. The facts that cause me the most hesitation are the kids. My daughter is about to start high school and has expressed a desire to go back to a traditional brick and mortar school. Although I do enjoy having them home so that we can influence their learning and provide them help when they need it, I will not inhibit their return to a more traditional school if they desire it. But, then what do we do about the move? If my daughter goes to high school and makes new friends, it is very unlikely that a move to a different school district, possibly well out of reasonable driving distance from these new friends would be well received. My son does not currently express the same desire to return to traditional schooling, but he does have friends in our neighborhood that he will surely miss.
Then we need to consider the fact that, although these years are super-important to the children from their perspective, I know that as they grow these years will become significantly less important. Furthermore, they would be able to adapt to the new environment and social situation (likely with some upfront struggle) and would come out of it stronger. I really don’t know which way to go. There are benefits to staying put until the kids complete school such as building up a large sum of cash for a down-payment on the next house and providing the children with stability until they are legal adults. The drawbacks are that those years (six years to be precise) are years that I could be improving my future land, building soil, growing my business, and building a loyal custom base.
The decision to leave the Army, move to a larger property, and start a full-time farm is not one to be taken lightly. I weigh the pros and cons often which causes my confidence in my ability to decide to falter. The safe play financially is to wait until the kids graduate high school, and that is also the one that provides them the most social stability. That being said, I am almost 40 now, and the years that I will have to dedicate to physical labor are numbered (although I hope that number is a high one). I will continue to think on it, gather information, and refine my reasoning. Either way, I am on contract with the Army for two more years, so I don’t have the option of full-time farming until then. Moving, however, is an option that is available anytime.
Tanya’s side of the Story
I have always loved my little house. The bedrooms are very small I admit, but this house has everything I ever wanted. We have been here so long that I can’t really imagine living anywhere else. I have great neighbors that always help out with things while my husband is away and give me company when he is gone. However, the children are growing up before my eyes and the house is getting smaller and smaller. The children think that the only reason I want to move now is so my dog has more room. While there is a small amount of truth to that, it is not the main reasoning. We (dog included) just need more room.
Today was a stressful day where nothing was going right. I gave up and decided to take a nice relaxing bath, right smack in the middle of the day. Well, as soon as I got to soaking, my son had to go to the bathroom. Ok. I pulled the curtain closed and told him he could go. Evidently, he did not have to go pee as I had assumed. When he finally left, I got to soak and enjoy the nice, heavy, poop smell mixing with my lavender bath bomb smell. Lavender poop aroma bath, not exactly what I had in mind. I NEED two bathrooms! It is a must at this point. The need to move is now. Also, I need to add a bathroom fan to the “must have” list, just in case.
I do worry about how the move will affect our children. I know Alayna wants to go back to public school and I think the socialization would be good for her. She also has her best friend in the neighborhood that she grew up with. Leaving her would be hard even though they do not hang out every day like they used too. CJ doesn’t have any interest in public school and he does have friends here but, now a days, they only ever play online via the XBOX any way. I can’t even remember the last time they saw each other in person and they are both so close I could hit their house with a rock thrown from my porch. CJ probably wouldn’t even know we moved. Nothing will change for him. Gone are the days were every kid in the neighborhood practically lived at my house and called me Grove Mom.
I think that the move needs to happen relatively soon. The children will have struggles I am sure, but they are also at a good point to move. I would hate for Alayna to go back to school, make new friends and then have to leave them. While waiting for them to finish school might be better financially, I do not think that is the best for the children. They would still have to make a difficult choice and possibly leave longtime friends or jobs in order to join us at the new place. Also, I value the opportunities they will have on the farm. If we wait till they are done with school that opportunity to work together as a family may never happen. These kiddos of ours are pretty tough cookies and I think that we have included them in our plans and ideas enough that they are comfortable with them and prepared to make the move. I also feel that they need more room now vs later as well. Their rooms are just so tiny. I wish my husband could see how they get excited over normal room sizes when we browse houses online. They pick rooms out right away! He will see for himself when he gets home.
Another benefit of moving now is that maybe the kids love the farm and want to live there forever, never leaving their mother? Could happen.
I feel postponing the move/farm life is not a good idea because things happen, life has funny way of getting in the way of your dreams. There is never going to be the perfect moment for any of us. Something is always going to come up or mess our plans up. So, let’s just go for it. Let’s just do it while we can. Worse case, we have a cool new house and lots of land for us to enjoy and live in peace. I can deal with that. Move now, we can start a small-scale farm, get some experience under our belts, get a feel for the business aspect of it and go from there. We have two years to figure out if we continue farming and go full scale or if we turn it into a dog rescue and I can happily foster all the homeless dogs of the world. And by foster, I mean keep all of them, forever.
The time is now, lets get this party started.
Ps… if we wait, I will be old and won’t be able to run from the chickens and I will most likely meet my death at the feet of Mr. Pecker.